I was given permission to post this on our blog. Please read. This might be a post not many even comment on…sad but true. Too intense? Too political? I don’t know but hope it’s read.
It is very heart warming and humbling to know our blog about everything can influence a person like to this to share their horrific story and then thank us for publicly posting who we are….people are amazing and this is one reason I try to diversify our BLOG.
“Hi Leslie
I have been reading your blog now for a while and have really enjoyed it. I just wanted to share with you how much it means to me and to thank you for the time you have put into it – sharing so much of your life. Also to Cheryl for her work with the It get’s better video. I had seen the video first and then somehow stumbled upon your blog. It has meant the world to me to see your lives together as normal and healthy – something to be celebrated and lived. In the video I had never heard women speak of their lives and sexuality in such a positive way and it captivated me. Growing up – gay only meant men and it was directly connected with rejection, abuse, isolation and the infliction of pain on the whole family. My uncles are gay and I lived in a world where gay could not be spoken – at all. In my own life at 18, I was identified as a lesbian – this lead to everything I had been taught it meant. My closest friend was removed by her family from university and thrown out of the house – living day to day and meal to meal homeless; I was devastated by that loss and knowing what happened was because of me. I was dealt with by her family circle with rape, attempted gang rape, stalking, death threats and finally being abandoned to die alone. I was forced to move and lost nearly everyone I knew. The only ones I didn’t lose where those who never knew what was going on. I never told anyone what had happened and never reported anything not wanting to lose any more. Its taken many years to finally come to the point of facing things. I suppressed everything – all feeling and refused to acknowledge that part of me. This lead to decades of depression, anxiety issues and a lot of decisions that were not based on who I really am but who I thought I needed to be to survive. Your blog is in a way like a travel brochure – strange analogy I know but It gives encouragement and hope; a window into what I thought was only a dreamed place. I am not in a position to post this on your blog but still wanted to let you know how much it means to me.”
I hope this person who sent this to me reads how much this email means to us…it’s not always about motorcycles, fun and glory…there are real people out there who struggle with their own lives, living a life that perhaps is not real…we find that truly sad and unfortunate but reality. Sexuality should be rejoiced and embraced not feared.
I wish we never would receive email like this but….in 2013 some feel that difference, diversity and sexuality is a topic still open for debate, judgements and disgust. We are lucky in that we are able not to care about those who judge us for being gay and living our everyday “normal” lives. Cheryl and I are fortunate to have a stable foundation, a group of friends and colleagues as well as family who just couldn’t give a shit that we are two women. There are way too many others things to worry about in life than who we love to be honest.
Thank you to the author of this email and one day I hope you too can be who you are without fear and judgement. In the meantime if you find our blog and emailing me helpful…please do so…and THANK YOU for taking the time to share your story.
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Advgrrl Motorcycle Adventures & More 
What a horrible way for a human being to be treated. As a heterosexual I am saddened and embarrassed when I hear stories like this. I can’t even began to imagine what it would be like to be gay and scared to tell anyone including your own family or to not be able to live the life that you deserve to live.
Why is it that these people that treat others so badly think they are the “normal” ones?
I’m having difficult getting the image out of my mind how this woman felt for being treated like this just because she was not like them.
I know it’s beyond my comprehension that she would have to go through this. I am glad you commented…you are the first and I appreciate that. It’s a tough thing to not only come out but also to have a BLOG that seems to not fit into a box as well. It is so interesting what I post here and what is popular and what topics seem to be over looked.
Don’t get me wrong I am grateful anyone comes by this blog of ours, but if I read this letter somewhere I would have to comment. I am a bit saddened that yours is the first to be honest. Thanks!
Leslie,
I found your blog months ago when I became a motorcyclist. I have learned a lot reading your posts but never commented before. After reading the above story, I needed to say something.
The way the writer was treated comes from ignorance. We, as a society, need to discuss this and many other topics more frequently. It is the only way our society can evolve. What she did (writing to you and allowing posting her story), your posts sharing a part of your life and who you are are huge steps in the right direction.
Thanks for bringing this topic to our attention. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t see lots of comments, just know that there are lots of people reading and thinking, commenting with friends and family. Keep up the good work and thanks again.
Thanks Antonio for the words of encouragement. I glad you said that you think folks are perhaps thinking and commenting with friends and family. This has to be the most horrific email I have ever received yet I also feel like you do it is a topic needed to be addressed. Thanks again for your comment and I shall keep blogging whatever feels right for the day. 😉 Leslie
Thank you for posting the email. It is heartbreaking that this sort of thing still goes on. Both of you carry out an important role; a positive representation of gay lives. I’ve never believed in outing people, but I do believe that those of us who are able to live openly gay lives have a duty to do so, to show the world that we aren’t evil, and to provide positive role models for those less fortunate than us. Too many peple are under the illusion that “it’s 2013, it’s fine to be gay, there are no more issues”, the current reports coming from Russia (& elsewhere) are a painful reminder that that is far from true.
I love following your motorcycle adventures, and I feel homoured to be allowed ‘into’ your lives. Keep up the great work.
Many best wishes from England
Well Kate we are who we are aren’t we? Cheryl & I have never really had an overt issue not to be out. WE are fortunate and anyone who has opposed to be honest we do not give the time of day. Cheryl has been true to herself throughout her RCMP career and has gained nothing but respect. I have been out ever since I could admit to myself that I am gay.
Like I have said there are way too many things in 2013 to worry about than who we hooked up with. It is difficult enough to be “happy” in these times. This email is a harsh reminder of the cruel world we do live in and I for one just don’t get it. No one should be treated like this author of this email…NEVER and it pains me I even received it. Thanks for commenting on what we hope will eventually be a topic that becomes obsolete. But for now…you will see posts like this one continue as long as we feel there is a reason too. Hope all is well over yonder…Leslie
Im lost for words 😦
Throughout my life I’ve often struggled to understand why people feel that they need to impose their beliefs on others and worse, to punish others who don’t share those beliefs. Whether it’s sexual preferences, religion, politics or something else the fear and hate of the different and unknown seems to be at the core of many of the big problems our world faces now and has faced over the years.
Relationships are simply that – the connection between people regardless of gender. Based on your blog, I think you set a great example to all (gay or straight) and I have learnt a lot from your writings – and I only found your blog because of your riding and the bikes you’ve reviewed!
I wish there was something I could say to the author of the original letter that would somehow make things a little better for her, but I think your example has given her more hope and comfort than I could hope to express.
Thanks and keep it up!
Thanks for your comment Pete and love how you highlight relationships being simply a connection between people. A relationship no matter what form that tend to not be simply in dynamics. Why add ignorance to the pot eh?
I have a group on FB which is totally unrelated to this. But, what I have found is that even people who don’t always comment or even click like on something, they are reading things posted there and talking about it offline with others. Sometimes people don’t say something about subject or a post, because they are appalled that human beings could treat one another that way.
I grew up in the South in the 70’s and we were right at that point where young adults in their 20’s were accepting their kids having black friends, while the generation before them still refused to accept it and said disgusting things about it that sometimes led to fist fights.
When those types of incidents happened (often at family gatherings), many of those younger, more opened minded people had the same reaction. Didn’t know what to say, left speechless, in shock.
But, they did take notice of it and what kind of ignorance it was born of. And, they made sure their kids did NOT turn out that way. I guess you call it ‘silent resistance’. But, today in 2013 you tell a 20-something what happened in the 70’s around here and they just can’t believe it, they even laugh out loud at the thought it could have happened. Because it doesn’t happen anymore. Not in my town anyway.
It wasn’t new laws, government or law suits that made that happen. It was those parents who didn’t say anything but, eliminated the problem from within their homes. So, people are reading and taking note. Trust me. 😉
I am hearing this a lot lately, not all comment or like but think….I should relish that thought versus being a bit arrogant to think 100’s would want to post. I love the comments here no matter what the topic is…and this one is an obvious thinker. Thanks Kevin…I see your likes A LOT and that you stop by often. I appreciate your comments and interest in this blog….Leslie
Oh, it’s not arrogance on your part at all. Your welcome. But, there’s always something interesting here. That’s what keeps people coming back.